Exigent
by soda-denial
Summary: Dib has finally done it - Zim is finally dead. But... what now? Eventual Zim/Dib. Of a sort.
1. Chapter 1

Jhonen V owns them, not me.

* * *

**Exigent**

**A**drenaline coursed though Dib's body as the reporter neared the front door. Excited little sounds squeaked out of the adolescent's throat. Dib was at the door before the doorbell had finished ringing.

"Hi!" he exclaimed, exuberantly.

The reporter eyed him. "Hello." A pause. "Dib?"

"Yeah, that's me! Come in!" Dib ushered the reporter into his living room and showed the reporter to the couch.

"Okay so..." The reporter pulled out a small computer, hands poised on the keys. Dib was wriggling around in his boots. "Dib Membrane?"

There was a pause before Dib replied, "Yeah, close enough."

"So Dib... Tell me about this alien you captured."

A grin exploded on Dib's face. "Well, his name is Zim, he has been in disguise on Earth for about four years now, and he's from a planet called Irk, making him Irke—"

Dib stopped when he saw the reporter raise a skeptical eyebrow. "Uh huh. And where is he right now?"

Dib pursed his lips quickly for a moment, fearing he was not being believed _again_, but quickly broke the stoic expression in favor of a triumphant smirk. "He's in the basement—my dad is inspecting the body."

"So the alien is dead then?"

"Yeah, I actually was able to—"

"Wait, did you say your father... _Professor Membrane_ is downstairs?"

"...Yes."

"I do believe we should go down to see him, shouldn't we?"

In barely contained excitement, the reporter rushed off to the basement (somehow knowing the way there; Dib figured Membrane had, at some point, released the blue prints to their house to the general public.) Of course, the reporter running off to find Membrane burst Dib's bubble slightly, yet the thought of the (minor) threat of Zim being gone forever blew it up again. Dib raced down the stairs after the reporter.

"Hello Professor!" Hearing no response, the reporter took that as an invitation to continue. "What do we have here? When is the autopsy scheduled?"

"We're cutting him apart tonight," Dib answered, drawing some attention back to him. The reporter stared at Dib as though Dib wasn't supposed to be there. The paranormal investigator scowled. He was done being ignored though. Dib opened his mouth to retort the look he was being given when Membrane interrupted him. Sort of.

"My son... Son!" There was no excitement in the Professor's voice, he was simply being loud and dramatic, per his usual. "You have actually discovered an extra-terrestrial life-form! I have spent the past thirteen point seventy-six hours attempting to dissuade myself from believing you, and attempting to see if this boy did in fact have a skin condition, but, alas, there is no other option. You have discovered an alien."

And, with that, Dib's mind promptly exploded. Well, almost. The shock of hearing that Membrane believed him, though, was a great one, in many ways. Dib was so grateful, so incredibly grateful, that his father had finally chosen to see the truth, and yet it was the man's choice of "dissuade myself" that sort of irked Dib.

"Y-Yeah, thanks Dad..." Dib muttered.

The reporter departed soon after that, having all they needed for their article.

"Dib, I am going to have this alien transferred to my lab for the autopsy, if you are going to accompany me, you should get ready now," Membrane stated. Dib nodded quickly , and before he knew it, they were at the famous Membrane facilities.

Somewhere deep in the lab, Dib found Zim's motionless body lying on a metal table. A sadistic cackling filled his lungs and burst forth, ringing in the silent room. Dib laughed maliciously until his sides hurt. There was nothing better than seeing your enemy dead on a table and knowing it was entirely your fault—no, entirely your doing. Dib could not help but be ecstatic.

Soon after this episode, Dib was ushered off into the viewing room. Apparently he would not be taking part in the actual autopsy. Slightly put-off, Dib watched in subdued joy. Turns out, it was a long and boring process, in which Dib, accidentally of course, tuned out everything around him. He zoned out completely. A sharp buzzing sound awoke Dib an amount of time later.

The autopsy was over, Zim's body completely destroyed and examined. Dib shrugged when he realized he missed much of it—he could always buy a copy of the video. Dib strolled causally down into the room where Zim was dismembered, noticing the sour-sweet smell, that Dib presumed was of the alien's blood.

"Son, this day has been incredibly productive in terms of discovery," Membrane stated, dramatically. Dib nodded, unsure of how to proceed in the conversation. "I have discussed it with the medical examiners and they will allow you to take a piece of the alien."

Dib's eyes widened. "What? Really? What kind of piece?"

Membrane mulled it over. "Well, nothing of great importance of course," a pause, "but as long as you are capable of preserving it, any other chunk."

Dib stared at the mangled alien before him; the green skin which was peeled back to expose the area where Zim's "squeedlyspooch" once had resided. Dib snickered at the alien's frequent shouting about pain in the area. He noticed the variation of colors of the juices littered around him—green, of course, but there was also blue, in abundance too, as well as some pink. The pink reminded Dib of Zim's pak. His pak!

Dib's eyes quickly scanned the room for any sign of the metallic shell that Zim always adorned. His eyes caught sight of it in the corner of the room, glinting as usual. Dib broke out into a great grin, an expression which was becoming commonplace on his pallet of facial appearances. Dib speedily gathered the metal in his arms, "I would like this."

Membrane took one glance at the metal in Dib's hands and nodded. "No use for that metal, especially since we have the robot and spaceship in custody anyway."

"You have Gir?" Dib was confused. He did not manage to capture Zim's robot when he'd killed Zim. Not for lack of trying or anything, Gir had been simply too annoying to bring along.

"If that is what you call it, yes."

"Wow."

They were silent for the rest of the ride home. As soon as the front door opened, Dib ran up to his room, instantly constructing a make-shift case for Zim's pak. Dib then came back downstairs, ate something, and watched the news, hoping for some mention of him.

After a rather disappointing newscast (which did not include Dib after all) he retired to his bed. Dib stared at his ceiling happily reflecting on the amazing events of the day—despite the fact that he may not be recognized as he'd hoped. Dib wondered how his life would change after this whole thing.

Zim... Zim was his main enemy, the biggest threat to Earth since humans themselves, and his main cause of injury. Dib was curious to see what else he could accomplish without Zim to worry about. His thoughts reverted to the mutilated corpse on the table from earlier, wondering if it was that easy to destroy a human.

Then, Dib remembered Zim's pak—and how it included all of Zim's mind, memories, and consciousness. Dib made a mental note to make a better container for the pak.

* * *

Oh my. I have been thinking about writing this for a while.  
Updates shall not be common :C  
...The reporter lacks a gender. I imagined them as one of those people where you just can't tell.

-Taryn C:


	2. Chapter 2

**Exigent**

Several weeks passed, Dib's life not significantly changing—his dreams of grandeur alterations quickly crashed and burned. He did have more credibility, and yet, no one paid any more attention to him. In fact, Gaz paid less attention to him, opting to ignore rather than threaten. Dib, despite his disappointment, considered this a plus.

Dib spent much of his time inspecting an old Victorian house just outside the city, attempting to find ghosts.

"I know you're here somewhere!" Dib shouted. "I'll find you!" He was loudly crying this out and running around holding out a large dish shaped microphone and large headphones adorned his head. He had caught no sounds other than his own—but that was to be expected, Dib wasn't exactly being quiet as he inspected the large house. Dib sighed unhappily. He had been snooping around this house for a week after it was shown on Mysterious Mysteries.

"I'm being too loud," Dib stated, deflating a little bit. "I'm just... gonna go home for today." Dib slumped and slowly wandered home.

He stole a piece of Gaz's pizza before retiring to his bedroom. Dib turned his computer on and stared at the screen blankly. Dib noticed that despite the fact that Zim was gone, the cameras placed in his house were still active. Dib also observed the FBI nor anyone else were present in the house.

Before Dib knew it, he was sitting on Zim's couch watching television. It was only when Dib reached Zim's house that he realized he'd neglected to inform the authorities about Zim's "basement."

"Oh, I should go down there!" Dib shouted during a commercial. Dib chose the elevator hidden under the decorative table, residing just across the room.

Once in the lab, Dib immediately began fiddling with some strange objects piled in a large room.

After nearly melting off his fingers, Dib left that particular room. He continued through Zim's lab, pausing when he came to a room labelled 'Experiments.' After a quick moment of deliberation, Dib chose to enter the room.

Enormous glass test tubes lined the walls of the room. Only some of the tubes had creatures contained in them, the rest were filled with a pinkish, bubbling liquid, not unlike the one Dib saw after Zim's autopsy. He ventured further inside, in morbid curiosity. Dib noticed Zim had apparently acquired many subject from other planets, as none of the one's he could see were human. Dib stopped to examine one particular alien, who appeared gigantic and powerful—raising the question of how Zim managed to contain it, and, not to mention, capture it.

As Dib moved closer and closer a sudden movement caught his eye. It came from a tube further down the row. Dib chose to figure out what it was—the creatures in all of the tubes Dib had seen so far had been subdued somehow, but movement meant the substance used as a tranquilizer was not operational.

Dib reached the tank in which he thought he had seen the motion and had to do a double-take when he saw the contents of the tank; a human. The person inside was probably mid-teens, around Dib's age.

Rage built up in Dib—he couldn't believe Zim would actually test on humans. Dib thought he'd done a decent job, after freeing Nick, of making sure no one else got captured by the alien.

After these thoughts ran through Dib's mind, he knew he had to fee this subject of Zim's—immediately. Dib turned to the computer attached to the tube, as it appeared to be controlling the particular tank. Dib frantically pressed buttons and reading the combination of Irken and broken English there.

As Dib attempted to figure out how to open the cylindrical container, he came across some devastating information.

"It's a good thing I'm fluent in Irken..." Dib mused. "But honestly, what's wrong with that alien? Taking people's brains out. Doesn't anything strike him as wrong? Ugh." Dib closed the window of information, giving up on helping this human, as Dib knew he would not be successful in his liberation. Death was imminent without a brain, outside the test tube.

Dib dejectedly left the room—as he couldn't take seeing the poor trapped creatures.

"I should turn them over to the authorities... Knowing them, they probably think Zim is—err was, the only alien out there..." Dib muttered to himself.

As Dib wandered through the lab he saw many rooms and things he clearly remembered from their younger days: the room containing the brain parasite, the room with the controls to the Irken Armada main ship, where Zim had put Dib under a virtual reality delusion to see if Dib had thrown the muffin, and so many more.

"We sure had... well, fun when we were younger," Dib reflected. In the more recent years, Zim and Dib's battle for the Earth became more vicious, and far less ridiculous. There were no giant hamsters and no giant water-balloon wars—in fact, there was no water fights at all. Dib and Zim, out of the blue, started fighting harder. When Zim's plans became better (slightly), Dib had to put far more effort into foiling them, as well as capturing Zim. Dib smirked. "Turns out, I win," he stated in triumph.

Dib's communicating watch beeped; Gaz was calling him. He raised his arm up to face level and saw a small image of his younger sibling.

"Yeah? What's the matter?" Dib asked, opening communications between the two watches.

"Come home now." Gaz hung up as soon as she said that. Dib frowned but headed to the exit.

"...it's not like I can't come back tomorrow or anything..." Dib reminded himself.

As it turned out, Gaz only wanted Dib to return home to pay for the pizza she ordered. Dib scowled and forked over enough money for the pizza before slumping off to his bedroom. Again.

Staring out the window, Dib consciously noticed it was not late out at all, and there were plenty of usable hours left in the day. Pulling out Zim's pak, Dib began examining the ins and outs of the thing.

"Oh so there's a cord that goes inside to attach it!" Dib exclaimed after finding deep holes in it. "I wonder if I could synthesize it... There could be so much to learn from this thing!" Dib's excitement was rejuvenated as he placed the pak on his desk, in a dome shaped analysis machine Dib had borrowed from his father. A few beeps later, the machine spit out a piece of paper, saying no analysis could be completed as the material was of unknown origin.

"Guess I'll have to do this manually then," Dib grumbled. The extra work didn't bother him too much, it was how Zim still managed to be difficult after death.

Hours later, Dib was exhausted and had barely made any progress. Drooping eyelids overpowered determination, and, with limbs of jelly, Dib collapsed onto his bed for the night.

The next morning Dib shot straight out of bed, as he realized he'd left Zim's pak just sitting on his desk. Gathering the strange metallic thing in his arms, Dib quickly inspected it for changes. Finding none, Dib's panic receded, and the dream he'd had floated back into his mind; the dream about how to construct a cord to attach the pak to his computer. Dib didn't even consider the logic of following a dream as blue-prints for the cord.

He immediately set to work.

* * *

Gosh darn this fic.  
This chapter is superbly short.  
Makes me rage. Slightly.

-Taryn


End file.
